August 4, 2021
I have been traumatized to the point that I needed to dissociate my identities permanently. I have experienced traumas all my life and I am thankful that Jesus had been with me all my life, who knows me so intimately. I have been fragmented as Alice, when Jessica the core personality no longer was able to hold the traumas. Alice was the first name created, then it was Poppy and then Engel. There had been traumas so deep, that it split through my spirit and soul asunder, that I no longer have a self, the self in Jessica.
Dearest Jesus, please heal the traumas of Jessica, the traumas of Alice, the traumas of Poppy and the traumas of Engel, for I have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and it is split personality, whereas Jessica was fragmented at the age of 15. The change of names is traumagenic. Alice was not able to hold the traumas, that it went to Poppy and then Engel. Lord, I am just a little sparrow who is fragmented into four parts, I cannot seem to control this splitting, for the brain had naturally split this to endure the traumas. I had times I forgot all my traumas via dissociation, but then in 2016, a sexual trauma at the church then had triggered all the flashbacks and left me disabled.